Tony Snow Breaks Lie Detector
Washington, D.C. - White House press secretary Tony Snow has done what no other press secretary has ever done. He has singlehandedly broken a polygraph machine, also known as a lie detector.
This unique feat occurred during Snow's regularly scheduled press briefing when some enterprising engineers using remote access technology attempted to test their latest and most advanced lie detector. Snow was unaware that this test was occurring and answered the White House press corps questions according to his normal routine. Within minutes, the machine was belching smoke and flames. Fortunately, firefighters were called and they were able to extinguish the rapidly growing blaze before too much harm was done.
Fred Fitzroy of the American Polygraph Institute said, "I've never seen anything like it. The machine was detecting so many lies at such a rapid pace that it simply overheated and fried all of the circuits. No machine could have withstood the magnitude of this withering onslaught against the truth."
In a related development, President George W. Bush has given the Presidential Medal of Freedom to the White House press corps for their continuing servitude to his administration and the Republican Party.