Sunday, October 08, 2006

Detainees Being Tortured By Lee Greenwood & Toby Keith

Guantanamo, Cuba - Detainees at Guantanamo continued their hunger strike into the second week as a protest against what they say is the inhumane treatment they are receiving at the hands of their American interrogators. In particular, the detainees are upset with the latest change in interrogation techniques which now includes alternating waterboarding with forced exposure to Lee Greenwood and Toby Keith songs played at a high volume.

Many of the detainees have said that they consider the waterboarding a cruel form of torture but that it pales in comparison to the music of Greenwood and Keith which they claim is a punishment that no man should have to endure. On the other hand, interrogators believe they have found the most effective tool for breaking their prisoners and extracting information.

One interrogator who wished to remain anonymous said, "Hell, every time we crank up the volume on Lee Greenwood and Toby Keith the detainees just fall apart and start blabbing like little babies. They'll do anything just to get us to turn off the music. Funny thing is, we tried everything, sleep deprivation, extreme stress positions, waterboarding, prolonged exposure to freezing temperatures. Nothing and I mean nothing, works like Lee Greenwood and Toby Keith. As for me and the other interrogators, we wear earplugs so it doesn't bother us at all."

This change in interrogation techniques is not without its critics. Several lawyers familiar with international law have said that forcing the detainees to listen to the music of Lee Greenwood and Toby Keith is clearly cruel and inhumane treatment under the Geneva Conventions.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

If torture wasn't so disgusting, this might be funny.

8:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yet another way that the U.S. Government will go bankrupt ... each time they play a Toby Kieth tune or Lee Greenwood jingle, they'll have to pay ASCAP or BMI royalty fees to the songwriters and musicians. Our tax dollars at work ... but not at work rebuilding New Orleans!?!

I used to like the "old" and "true" Country Music sounds (Johnny Cash, Merle Haggard, etc). But what passes for Country Music today is just a bad attempt at trying to add fiddles and twang to a poor imitation of Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock & Roll".

The "Blues" had a baby and they named it "Rock 'n Roll".

The "Old Time Rock 'n Roll" drank too much Miller Beer and threw up on the dance floor, and they called it "Modern Country".

3:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm.......bashing Toby Keith. Sounds like pure, unadulterated jealously to me or.....are you one of those Dixie Chucks???

5:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the idiot who posted this.
Obivously you do not know anything about TOBY KEITH at all.
He is a fine upstanding honorable man. He is very compassionate and helps more
people than you probably ever will.
He has said over and over again that he doesn't support the war in IRAQ , but he supports
our troops no matter where they are stationed.
He would never allow his music to be used in this manner and for you to ridicule him and his music
this way is deplorable.
I would think you could find something better and more constructive to do with your time than to defame
someone like TOBY. There are surely better things you could discuss that are fact, than to print lies
such as these.
TKIFC aka : tksbabygirl

5:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well how very special...Lets see we are in Cuba?? Hmm...Like they even got a frigging clue what good music is...and the person who wrote this should be slapped real hard and tossed in a sewer tank full of cubans,....LOL....Mean, you bet ya,,, and us TK Warriors got alot more then this ,i am being nice.....Bring it on...How many of you all been to a live concert of either Toby or Lee?? ...Bay of Pigs all over agian...Proud ot be a long time Toby WaRRIOR from Oregon U.S.A.

9:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had heard Cubans were A$$ Holz...Now I know its true...Don't put down great American music if ya don;t have nuttin' nice to say, Shut the hell up...P.S. R U related to the Dixie Chicks??....From...An American who loves country music, especially Toby and Lee.....

9:47 PM  
Anonymous ljn said...

Bashing Toby Keith in this way is an insult to him, his family and the hundreds of thousands of fans who respect him....what a small, short person this blogger must be!

7:26 AM  

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