Pledge Of Allegiance Now Mandatory In USA
Washington, D.C. - Today, the Congress passed and the President signed legislation requiring every man, women and child in the United States to begin each and every day with a recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance. This new law is meant to instill in Americans of all ages the importance of liberty and of being able to freely state your love and undying obedience to the country.
As required by the new act, schools and places of employment will set aside a few minutes each day for their students and employees to stand in unison for the pledge. Failure to stand and recite the pledge will lead to a one-week suspension from school for students. Employees who fail to stand and recite the pledge will be docked one week's wages. Repeat violations will lead to an extended stay at the nearest Halliburton Luxury Resort & Spa.
Also, to ensure universal enforcement, citizens who report the noncompliance of this law by their neighbors, friends and relatives will receive a substantial financial reward. If you know someone who is failing to recite the Pledge of Allegiance on a daily basis please contact the Office of Allegiance at the United States Department of Justice in Washington, D.C. Your identity will be kept secret and all rewards will be paid within 30 days.