Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Fred Thompson Seen Holding Baby In Ronald Reagan Movie

Stockholm, Sweden - A Swedish computer analyst has discovered that if a reverse print of the Ronald Reagan movie Knute Rockne, All American is super-imposed on top of the original print an image that resembles Fred Thompson appears holding what some say is a football, but others say is a baby.

Art Historian Marcia Funebre of The Cato Institute Museum of Perfectly Normal and Not Pervy Art believes that the image is not a fluke. "Yes, that is definitely Fred Thompson sitting to the right of Ronald Reagan and to the left of Pat O'Brien," said Professor Funebre, "And, no, I do not think Fred Thompson is holding a football. I very clearly see a baby wrapped in a blanket."

The interpretation of the movie has long fascinated scholars with many feeling that the Ronald Reagan movie has a deep symbolism pointing to much more than an ordinary Hollywood tale.

"There is an entire set of hidden messages in Knute Rockne," explained Prof. Funebre, "Looking at this movie, many people have seen the ghost of Calvin Coolidge ("The business of America is business") hovering over Ronnie's right shoulder. This shows that The Gipper was the chosen one, scion of the American Gilded-Age."

Asked about the significance of the Fred Thompson image, Prof Funebre replied, "This is a clear indication that Fred Thompson has been anointed. The baby can be interpreted as both the future of the Republican Party and the future of America. It shows beyond a doubt Fred Thompson has been blessed and is the heir of the conservative philosophy, the one, true faith."

In a related story, a sound technician in Nebraska has reported that if the lyrics to The Star Spangled Banner are played backwards the words "Jesus says: 'Vote GOP', Jesus says: 'Vote GOP' " can be heard repeatedly over the phrase "the bombs bursting in air."

Written for Assimilated Press by roving reporter pinko


Anonymous Erika said...

Fred just makes those Republican hearts go all aflutter.

12:42 PM  

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