Bush Looks For Black Person To Hug

Minneapolis, Minnesota - President Bush visited the site of the Minneapolis bridge tragedy promising support for the area and pledging government help for speedy reconstruction. The president met with some survivors of the bridge collapse and the families of victims. Minneapolis demographically has a predominantly white population, and a great many of the victims were commuting to jobs. This seemed to confuse Mr. Bush who kept looking around for black people on welfare to hug.

Standing on the banks of the northern Mississippi, Mr. Bush pledged, "We will do what it takes to rebuild New Orleans. New Orleans will not be forgotten." After a hasty hand-over-mic intervention by an aide Mr. Bush added, "And I just wanted the people of Minneapolis to, uh, know that...about New Orleans, I mean. And you too...Minneapolis too...just like New Orleans. We, uh, you, uh, in our prayers...Laura's and mine."

Written for Assimilated Press by roving reporter pinko