Dennis Miller Found Hiding In Spider Hole
Anaheim, California - Right-wing commentator and one-time comic, Dennis Miller, today was found hiding in a small hole that he dug in a friend's backyard. Miller had been living in the hole for the last six months, surviving on saltine crackers and crunchy peanut butter. Apparently, Miller was distraught over recent career failures and his shame in giving President George W. Bush his complete and unquestioning support over the war in Iraq. Said Miller, "I was duped. What more can I say? I'm an idiot. I supported Bush because I thought he was good for the country and my career. I was wrong on both counts."
Miller was given a brief medical checkup, clean clothes and a bus ticket.