Friday, January 19, 2007

Prominent Americans Tied To Terrorists

During its January 19 program the television show Fox and Friends revealed that presidential contender Barak Obama’s middle name is Hussein. This alerted the American public that Obama, whose last name sounds eerily similar to Osama, may actually be a terrorist.

Assimilated Press investigative reporting has unearthed the striking fact that President George Walker Bush shares the same middle name as John Walker Lindh, “the American Taliban”, a known enemy combatant captured in Afghanistan. While terrorist ties between the two Walker men have not yet conclusively been established, at a recent public appearance G. Walker Bush was seen being escorted by armed law enforcement agents and surrounded by heavy security.

The White House, when questioned, declined to comment on the President’s middle name, fueling speculation that there may be compromising family ties between the American Taliban and the American President. The White House also declined to comment on whether G. Walker Bush had any part in J. Walker Lindh’s transfer from a Los Angeles prison to The Federal Transfer Center, an administrative facility in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, a city known for terrorist activity.

Former President George Herbert Walker Bush, father of the current president, held a press conference today regarding the name Walker. Mr. Bush began the conference by saying, “When Barbara and I named young George, the middle name thing, it seemed like a good idea at the time.” The former President then appeared to be overcome with emotion and was led away from the microphone, weeping. A Bush family spokesman hastily concluded the press conference.

Written for Assimilated Press by roving reporter pinko.


Anonymous Erica said...

Fox illogic turned back on itself. I love it.

9:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not Entirely Fiction:

From Wikipedia:

President Roosevelt signed the Trading With the Enemy Act after it had been made public that U.S. companies were doing business with the declared enemy of the United States. On October 20, 1942, the U.S. government ordered the seizure of Nazi German banking operations in New York City.

The Harriman business interests seized under the act in October and November 1942 included:

* Union Banking Corporation (UBC) (for Thyssen and Brown Brothers Harriman). The President of UBC at that time was George Herbert Walker, Prescott Bush's father-in-law. He is the grandfather and great-grandfather of the former and current Presidents Bush.

7:46 AM  
Anonymous Phil said...

Fox News hurts my head and gives me indigestion.

5:16 PM  
Blogger dusty said...

My orthopod makes me watch him every two weeks. He has 4 tv's in the waiting room. Avg. waiting time an hour..its enough to make me medicate before a dr. visit, I swear to god.

2:15 PM  
Blogger dusty said...

By watch..I mean Fox news..sorry for any confusion.

2:16 PM  

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