Mistakes To Be Trademarked & Board Certified

New York, New York - The American Trademark Association has created a subsidiary board to trademark and certify mistakes. "Everyone has heard the phrase 'mistakes were made' but you never get to find out who, exactly, made them," said Tucker Johnson, president of the association. "We felt there was a need to trademark those mistakes where the mistake-makers weren't getting the recognition they deserve."

Mr. Johnson said that in addition, a certification board was formed to create an industry standard for mistakes. "The Association of Stupendously Stupid Situations (ASSS) would give its seal of approval only to those mistakes which represent the pinnacle of error achievement," said Mr. Johnson. "Next time you hear 'mistakes were made' look at what's underneath. With the trademark, you will be able to tell who made the mistake. If it has the ASSS seal, you can be certain this mistake is huge."

The first trademark mistake to receive the ASSS seal of approval is the Heckuva. The Heckuva is an instant mistake activated by simply adding water.

Written for Assimilated Press by roving reporter pinko