Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity & Pat Buchanan Deported To Ireland

New York, New York - Yesterday, in a nationwide sweep of illegal immigrants, the Department of Homeland Security raided the offices of the major cable news networks in an attempt to ferret out employees who have been masquerading as American citizens. Rounded up in the crackdown were some of the biggest names in conservative punditry including Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity and Pat Buchanan. All three men had fraudulent identity documents at the time of their arrest.

During the course of an initial investigation, it was discovered that O'Reilly, Hannity and Buchanan were actually Irish citizens who had entered the country illegally many years ago. Investigators also found that they had good reason to leave Ireland. Bill O'Reilly was fleeing from a sexual deviancy charge in Limerick involving a dominatrix and a vat of unpasteurized cheese. Sean Hannity had escaped from a prison in Cork where he was serving a five year sentence for vandalizing a rectory. And, Pat Buchanan was wanted for arson, petty theft, larceny and narcotics trafficking in Dublin before he came to America by walking across the rugged unguarded border with Canada.

After a brief hearing, all three men were deported to Ireland where they were placed into custody by Irish authorities.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this funny? What am I missing?

6:33 AM  
Anonymous gringo pingo said...

Yes, anonymous, you're missing a brain, bloody, twit, troll.
My dearly, departed, drunken parents told me that I had Celtic ancestors. I never acknowledge it but I can't deny it since a number of police blotters have multiple entries relating my ancestors back to 1817. Since I live among Puerto Ricans & speak Spanish most gringos avoid me & I don't get asked if I'm Irish. Thank god for that & that I'm an atheist.


7:57 AM  
Anonymous enemy of the people said...

So. I guess the supply of Guiness, Irish Stew, and four-leafed clovers is going to tighten up now that these miscreants are back on the old sod.

Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of folks.

Oh, anonymous: It is funny because anything about these worthless assfucks is funny.

3:18 PM  
Blogger Phil said...


Is there any way I can forward this so I can get all my friends/relatives laughing too?

12:26 AM  
Anonymous KnickKnack said...

If you click on the envelope icon with the arrow to the right of the word comments you will be able to forward the link to your friends and relatives.

10:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

gringo pingo said..."Yes, anonymous, you're missing a brain, bloody, twit, troll."

Wow, didn't expect such a bile-filled overreaction, gringo. I must've touched a nerve.
Anyway, not really sure what your pedigree, or lack thereof, has to do with much here. Interesting to some, I guess, as it makes you uniquely qualified to find certain things amusing.
I guess name-calling is just second nature to you, but it essentially means you lost the argument. You may abuse me further now.

10:26 AM  
Anonymous gringo ping said...

Anniny Moose: I find it unsporting to engage in a battle of wits with one of your ilk who is clearly unarmed. Since you're unqualified to engage in a battle of wits, your conclusions are without merit.
While your invitation to abuse you further may be heart felt, I can't grant your request. It appears that you may be among those who feel that while sticks & stones may break your bones, words give you great psychic trauma.
I remain, as always, your better in all ways-

3:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Again, wow--you're just chockfull of cliches and logical phallacies today, pinga. "Sticks and stones"? "Battle of wits with one of your ilk who is clearly unarmed"?
Do you have any original thoughts, pinga? Or do you simply spout quotes from your favorite Indiana Jones movie or Page-a-Day calendar? Here's a quote: "Nazis-I hate those guys!"
I will now cease commenting, as you obviously need to have a conflict with someone in order to feel alive. Must be that heretofore hidden Celtic heritage.
Best of luck with your issues.

5:04 PM  
Blogger Lwayno said...

The were deported to Northern Ireland, the last outpost for Protestant Micks and were met by one 72 year-old virgin ,named Annie "Big-Foot" O'Coulter.
" Let The Grey Geese Fly" Uh! "Don't open your fly"
El Gringo Viejo, St. Patrick's Brigade

3:33 AM  
Blogger Bill O Rile Me said...

Deported to Ireland was freakin riot! Then dittohead above, entered, admitted he had no sense of humor, and ragged on folks for agreeing him, was just as funny! ROTFLMAO!

4:01 AM  

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