CNN Hires Neo-Nazi & Former KKK Imperial Wizard David Duke
Atlanta, Georgia - In an effort to bolster their appeal to conservative viewers and also increase their ratings at the expense of Fox News, CNN announced today that they have hired former Ku Klux Klan Imperial Wizard and present day neo-Nazi David Duke as an on-air commentator. He will be joining Glenn Beck and William Bennett who together with Duke have also been chosen by CNN to represent their corporate face to the American public.
In presenting this addition to their programming schedule, Jim Walton, president of CNN Worldwide, said "David Duke, Glenn Beck and William Bennett are the future of CNN and the direction we see as providing the greatest opportunities for our shareholders. Quite simply, it's time to face reality. Objective reporting of the news is dead. It's been dying for a long time and today we finally pulled the plug and took it off life support. The formula for success in this business is opinion and the rawer and rougher the better. Nobody watches television for facts or information anymore. They want their shows to be a contact sport. They want controversy, fights, winners and losers. Polarization may be bad for society but it's great for ratings and that's what we aim to deliver."
On his first appearance as a commentator for CNN, David Duke will be broadcasting live from the Reichstag in Berlin where he will talk about immigration and the preservation of America as a white Christian nation of European ancestry.