Cheney Renounces America & Becomes Citizen Of Dubai

Dubai, United Arab Emirates - In a move that surprised every one except his closest associates, Vice President Dick Cheney today renounced his American citizenship and said that at the conclusion of his term as vice president he would be following his current employer, Halliburton, as they move to Dubai in an attempt to avoid a newly empowered Democratic Congress and escape criminal proceedings for defrauding the United States of America in bogus contracts worth billions of dollars. Said Cheney, "I have been a loyal employee of Halliburton for many years. Now that I have been placed in the position where I am forced to choose between the country I was born in and the company that has given me great wealth, I have decided to choose Halliburton."

Highly placed sources in the White House have told Assimilated Press that Cheney has privately confided to the President that this move will enable him to escape both subpoenas from the Democratic Congress and trial at the International Court in The Hague. Following his conversation with the Vice President, President Bush instructed his aides to look for a nice little patch of land in Dubai where he can settle down after he leaves the White House.